Being true to yourself while adapting to change. This seems like a contradiction, but it is not. According to author Kyota Ko, the Zen monk Ikkyü Söjun (1394-1481) said it was not a contradiction; that people can and will do both.
Kyota Ko, paraphrasing Ikkyü, writes: «A transparent dewdrop remains unchanged yet glows in different shades with the changing season». That is, the essence of the drop (its transparency) remains, even though its appearance transforms to harmonize with the environment that holds it.
An example of this can be seen in Puerto Rico with the Poinsettia plant. Its leaves are green for most of the year, but they get a vibrant red color when the days get shorter and the nights get longer. Interestingly, it is the darkness that encourages and intensifies its characteristic red color.
The dewdrops on the leaves of a Poinsettia will still be dewdrops, but their brilliance changes as the color of the leaf changes. Its transparency is what allows it to adapt and reflect the beauty of change. Applying this image to the psychosocial dimension, transparency represents authenticity: showing ourselves as we are, without rigidity, but honestly reflecting each stage of our growth.
Author Vera Nazarein reinforces this idea by stating that “Sometimes, being true to yourself means changing your mind. Self changes, and you follow.” If your self changes, your behavior changes accordingly. Ikkyü Söjun and Vera Nazarein reflect that our “self” is in constant evolution and adaptation. Throughout life, in childhood, adolescence, adulthood, etc., we are the same person in a process of continuous growth and physical, mental, and emotional adaptation.
Being true to yourself does not consist of clinging to a fixed identity, but rather allowing your beliefs, opinions, and behaviors to transform in a way that is consistent with your life experiences and learnings. Clinging to the idea of “this is just who I am” to maintain beliefs or behaviors that no longer serve us limits our own development or well-being. Being true to yourself implies the courage to grow and adapt.
TIPS FOR STAYING TRUE TO YOURSELF WHILE ADAPTING TO CHANGE:
Practice self-awareness:
Keep a gratitude journal or a reflective journal. Take note of what you are grateful for. Throughout the year, take time to conduct an honest and transparent self-assessment of your attributes, thoughts, emotions, beliefs, and needs.
For some people, self-assessment can be an uncomfortable or unfamiliar practice, causing confusion or distress, <like being in the dark>. However, it is with the darkness that the Poinsettia achieves its intense red. This discomfort or “darkness” is necessary to develop our potential. Seek support from a mental health professional for a healthy approach.
Cultivate self-acceptance:
Acknowledge who you are in your present, accepting your attributes and your weaknesses. Accepting ourselves as we are, is the foundation for healthy self-esteem and for making changes in those aspects of ourselves that no longer work for us.
Exercise flexibility and adaptability:
Participate in different group activities, learning activities, or activities that are new to you. After evaluating and identifying what no longer works for you, create and implement a plan that supports you in continuously learning from changes.
Take care of yourself:
By receiving services from a mental health professional. Professional accompaniment, it can serve as a guide, promoting your self-esteem and personal growth.
I invite you to embrace both the constancy of your Self and the fluidity of your transformation.
References:
Cómo se ponen rojas las hojas de la flor de pascua – Ecologia Cotidiana
https://www.youtube.com/@kyotako1372/po
